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  1. #3531
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    it's a fun movie, no need to make such a fuzz about it.
    i can't stand game of thrones because it bores me with all the talking but no show yet you love to watch it, it's a difference of opinion not difference of quality.
    it's alive but cannot be living, it's dead but lives a mortal life.

    sorudo.9054

  2. #3532
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    I try not to confuse quality with what I like though...

    The concept of "guilty pleasure" fits in here... you know it's bad, but you're still enjoying it.

    Or things made bad on purpose, e.g. Sharknado.

    Or things made with low budget, but you can see what the movie could have been if it had the budget for better special effects and actors. It's like a good Indie game, you don't give it a bad review just because it can't afford the latest 3D graphics.

    Imagination means I can watch a movie like League for what it could have been rather than what it was. I don't confuse it with quality, because like a book, I read into it more than what was strictly written.

    The only way I could enjoy Twilight was to make fun of it. Even then, the 3rd one was soooo slow I had a hard time doing even that.

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    I try not to confuse quality with what I like though...

    The concept of "guilty pleasure" fits in here... you know it's bad, but you're still enjoying it.

    Or things made bad on purpose, e.g. Sharknado.

    Or things made with low budget, but you can see what the movie could have been if it had the budget for better special effects and actors. It's like a good Indie game, you don't give it a bad review just because it can't afford the latest 3D graphics.

    Imagination means I can watch a movie like League for what it could have been rather than what it was. I don't confuse it with quality, because like a book, I read into it more than what was strictly written.

    The only way I could enjoy Twilight was to make fun of it. Even then, the 3rd one was soooo slow I had a hard time doing even that.
    == Alaris & clone ==
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  3. #3533
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    I liked League. I liked Van Helsing. I even liked the Narnia movies, though I'm disappointed they never finished them.

    I refuse to defend myself for liking an entertaining popcorn movie. Nobody ever claimed Fritos are made of quality ingredients, but I like those too.
    mv

  4. #3534
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    Well said, MV.
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  5. #3535
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alaris View Post
    Well said, MV.
    Thanks. BUT HOWEVER ... Rob, you review movies like an expert, and I value your opinion, so please do not take this small rebellion as an insult to your talents. Reading your reviews has made me aware of things I had previously been ignorant of, and certainly taught me to detect flaws I wouldn't normally have noticed. I pointedly ignore accuracy and believability when watching these popcorn-type movies. If these magicians are good enough to fool me unless I delve too deeply into the movie, then they're doing their job.
    mv

  6. #3536
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    Well said, MV.
    == Alaris & clone ==
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  7. #3537
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    That double posting bug has really glitched out!

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  8. #3538
    You all have good points. And truth be told, I actually enjoyed Sharknado. We recently held a Halloween movie night at my place, with some friends, and lots of snacks. Sharknado was on top of the list of movies we had to watch. Some movies can simply be fun if you turn your expectations way down, and shut your brain down. And also, I'm glad you enjoy my reviews, and I hope my angry rants are even more entertaining. :P

    I think my main issue with League and Golden Compass, were that we were expecting something better than what we got. It's the same for Batman and Robin, where the Batman cartoon had established such a great back story for Mr Freeze. And Arnold in that role? I thought it was pretty awesome, even if Arnold isn't really considered a brilliant actor. We all hopes that it would be kinda decent. Anyway, I could go on all day about that movie. Even Clooney himself agrees on that one.

    BTW:


    Sharknado - 5/10
    (What were you expecting?)

    How do you even begin to rate a movie that is so self aware of it's low standards? The effects are dreadful, often on purpose I think. The acting and story are absolutely rubbish, and it all just looks terrible as well. There's zero suspense, and most of the humor is unintentional because of how bad it is... or it IS intentional. See, with a concept as stupid as Sharknado, they are clearly aware that they are making the dumbest movie in movie history. And they have sharks swimming around in water that doesn't even reach up to your ankles. So it has to be intentional, all of it.

    It actually takes quite a while before the title of the movie actually manifests itself. Before that it is just minor shark attacks, and characters talking. They even have room for some dumb but hilarious exposition ("A shark killed my family! That is why I hate sharks!"). This movie deserves to be mocked constantly as you are watching it. I believe it was the intention of the producers of this movie, that it would be watched in that way.

    For a movie that's trying to be as hilariously bad as it possibly could, it's a bit tame at times. Perhaps it is that balance that keeps it from looking like a movie that is too self aware, if you get my drift. It doesn't feel like they are constantly playing it for laughs. The movie never stops to wait for a laugh track. No, it honestly keeps going, and tries to take it some what serious. And I guess that's what make the movie work. It will probably keep you entertained from beginning to end, but don't expect it to be none-stop rollercoaster ride of stupid.

    So is it bad? YES! But is it fun? Well it is sort of entertaining in a bad way, but not as funny as just the title. If you've seen the trailer, chances are you've already gotten the most laughs out of the movie already. And the movie doesn't really bring anything new that you haven't already seen from that trailer. The movie has a few moments where they try to use practical effects, and where the heads of the sharks hilariously change size as they cut between CGI and prop. The green screening is pretty well done actually (better than Road to Hell, that's for damn sure). But of course there is a blatant disregard for how shallow the water is at times, and yet still have sharks swimming in it. There's a scene with a run away ferris wheel that is actually well done. And the ending will be the source of many funny animated gifs for decades to come, but it's not really worth seeing a second time.

    I give it a 5, because despite being bad, it's mostly intentionally bad, and it isn't too boring.
    Last edited by Rob Van Der Sloot; 12-11-2013 at 12:10.

  9. #3539
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rob Van Der Sloot View Post
    I'm glad you enjoy my reviews, and I hope my angry rants are even more entertaining. :P
    Not just entertaining, also informative. I've learned a few things about what makes movies good from you. I might disagree on a personal taste level, but I still recognize in many of your comments that you made an expert judgment. You make us see the divide between popular culture and real art.

    As for Sharknado, I was actually impressed that somehow they managed to keep having new things happen to people, new ways to die. The movie was actually pretty creative that way. I'd definitely say that if you liked the trailer, then expect the movie to deliver more of that.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Rob Van Der Sloot View Post
    I'm glad you enjoy my reviews, and I hope my angry rants are even more entertaining. :P
    Not just entertaining, also informative. I've learned a few things about what makes movies good from you. I might disagree on a personal taste level, but I still recognize in many of your comments that you made an expert judgment. You make us see the divide between popular culture and real art.

    As for Sharknado, I was actually impressed that somehow they managed to keep having new things happen to people, new ways to die. The movie was actually pretty creative that way. I'd definitely say that if you liked the trailer, then expect the movie to deliver more of that.
    == Alaris & clone ==
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  10. #3540
    On our horror night we watched a lot more than just Sharknado. We also watched Highway to Hell, Orcs and Piranha 3DD. I can tell you that talking my friends into watching Highway to Hell wasn't easy, after they had seen Road to Hell. Completely unrelated movies, but they sound so alike.

    Highway to Hell - 8/10
    (Original horror comedy, with horror in massive quotation marks. Gilbert Gottfried at Hitler. Need I say more?)

    http://tinyurl.com/kkc3mh6

    (Sadly the trailer gives away way too much of the movie, including the ending)

    I think I may have reviewed this movie before. But it doesn't get any worse on repeated viewings. Highway to Hell is a cult classic, and it is a shame it hasn't been released on DVD yet. I wonder who has the rights to this movie? This movie strikes the perfect balance between a dark comedy and action adventure. Early 90's special effects, mixed with a typical 80's action feeling. The only thing this movie has going against it, is that it doesn't actually have ACDC's Highway to Hell song in it, and that the end is clearly a bit rushed. There are a few flaws in the editing near the end, including a stunt where you can clearly see the mattress that the stunt people land on. Probably the result of tight deadlines. Still, I don't think any of my friends noticed this minor embarrassing detail. Highway to Hell's humor is clever. There are tons of references to mythology, and funny plays on words. One of my favorite scenes is when the protagonist's car breaks down in the desert, and he uses one of the emergency phone-poles to ask for help... in hell. They tell him to start walking, hahahaha.

    Orcs! - 4/10
    (A failed parody of Lord of the Rings)

    If the premise didn't give it away already, this movie is absolutely rubbish. What happens if the orcs of lord of the rings invade a US National Park, and start killing people? One of my friends actually expected this to be good. It wasn't good. It wasn't even good in a tongue in cheek way. There are plenty of references to scenes from lord of the rings, and they copy a few camera shots a couple of times. But those moments are neither funny nor clever. Apparently for this movie they got a few of the orc costumes from the actual lord of the rings movies, and they made a cheap horror movie out of it. If this had been a total gore fest, that could have saved the movie. But it's none stop digital blood, and digital muzzle flashes (and poorly done too). This is what a movie would look like if I fumbled about in After Effects for a few minutes, and didn't care much about the end product. I will however say that they at least shot it on location, and not in front of a green screen. The acting is barely passable, and the story actually ends on a cliffhanger... as if there will ever be a sequel! There's also not much variation in the costumes, and the orc leader is extremely underwhelming (he looks like a regular orc). Skip this!

    Piranha 3DD - 6/10
    (Everything with silicone dies; the movie)

    Boobs and gore, and mostly just boobs. This is horror with a focus on sexploitation with a big wink, and gore for comedic effect. And it's pretty entertaining. The special effects are pretty well done, although I didn't see it in 3D. And I can sure see which scenes were meant to be in 3D (hint: scenes with boobs). However, this movie is not as good as the first Piranha 3D (if there was any confusion, this is the sequel to Piranha 3D, which in itself is a remake of Piranha, which in itself was a Jaws rip off). Where this movie falls short, is oddly enough in the gore. There's not as many gruesome practical or digital effects, and people mostly just get pulled under in a cloud of red water. In the first one people literally got cut in two. Did they not have the budget for that this time around? All in all, this sequel just feels a lot smaller in scope, and that is a bit disappointing. For a sequel, you want them to raise the stakes, and make it an all round bigger movie. I will say that it was clever for them to find yet another stomach churning way for Piranha's to kill people, involving someone's penis. Extra points for creativity, and for showing the dismembered body part in 3D. Hey, if you're gonna go with bad taste, you might as well go all the way. The movie ends yet again on a cliffhanger, hinting at an even more absurd sequel. But if the budget goes down even further, I'll probably pass on a third installment.

    On a positive note, Christopher Lloyd (Doc Brown in Back to the Future) is back in this installment, and he is always entertaining. And there's even a cameo by David Hasselhoff. Actually it is more than just a passing cameo. And that is kind of where the movie jumps the shark (pun unintended). The movie is trying too hard to be funny. We've seen The Hoff make a cameo in the Spongebob movie... do we really need to have the same joke again? There's a difference between tongue in cheek humor, and trying really hard to get laughs from the audience. The first movie struck the right balance, but this sequel takes it too far. And it goes on too long with the Hasselhoff jokes. One short cameo would have been enough. We don't need to end the movie with him too, and play the Baywatch theme along with it. We get it! It's the Hoff! Move on!

    The movie won't bore you, and it does deliver on the gore (but not as much as the first movie did). Some parts are genuinely funny, and they even make a solid effort to provide a good plot for why the Piranhas are back. Also, one of the annoying kids gets eaten, and that's rare in horror movies. Some people might be turned off by that, but we were cheering on our couch. But while the movie does entertain, ultimately the first one is a far better movie.
    Last edited by Rob Van Der Sloot; 12-11-2013 at 17:37.

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